What's the most valuable lesson you've learned in life, and how has it impacted your journey so far?

Let's do what we always do, lay around half-naked while men make terrible jokes at our expense.

Two letters of transit signed by General De Gaulle … Stimpy, you eediot!

Yes, Tess, crime doesn't pay but apparently Rated-G horror does.

Are rich people harder workers than poor people as a whole?

I hear you're a stunt-double now for Fred in Scooby-Doo.

Times might be tough … But at least there's one thing we all agree on.

I've also been making ends meet ... By appearing in Tijuana splatter comics as Evil Gringo #2.

How can I stop overthinking and take action more quickly?

Torchy thinks: Maybe I could play a gangster's moll since apparently smoking is still seen as wholesome and American.

Every day is a good day to punch a Nazi! I mean MAGA! I mean the Comics Code Authority! (I can never remember who is who)

Shameless vixen! Trollop!

Why do almost all vertebrates have tails, but not apes and frogs?

“Your boyfriend is a total perv, mommy.”

Of all the layoffs, Torchy Todd and her gal pal, Tess Parker, were hit the hardest.

And then working as Betty and Veronica's body doubles ...

Why do some men like anal sex?

Remember, kids, masturbation will make you see the devil everywhere!

Only zombies dig to rock and roll, daddy-O!

At least until the peyote kicks in ...

What do you like about McDonald's?

Ironically, Wertham focused on stories about crime, singling out Batman and Robin for its gay subtext and Dick Tracy for its violence.

Perhaps now we can explore what being a “gal pal” really means.

Make Nazis afraid again!

Why do the Republican city officials at Springfield Ohio continue to deny that immigrants are eating pets to sabotage the Trump campaign, even though immigrant pet-eating is now widely believed to be true?

In 1954 complete bastard and censorship campaigner Fredric Wertham published a book for the stated goal of creating a moral panic around comic book's alleged impact on juvenile delinquency. Much like the House Committee on Un-American Activities' disastrous impact on the film industry, the Comics Code Authority (obey, puny humans) put many hardworking comic book characters out of work all because of one poorly written book called …

¡Explotando Dick por todos lados!

Just you, me, in a vat of lime jello, pulling hair, calling each other names …

How many women have accidentally pooped their pants and became turned on afterwards?

TEXT:

Gadzooks! It's Torchy Todd slumming it in Yugoslavian science fiction! The shame!

But Tess! I mean Betty! I mean Veronica! (I can never remember who is who) which ever one you are, I love you!

Did you know God exists? 900+ answers later and no atheist has yet to be successful. Day 8 of asking Atheists to provide a SINGLE argument that demonstrates a cause for the beginning of the universe while avoiding the problem of infinite regression.

Sex! Lingerie! Knock knock jokes!

Speaking of which, poor Cleo Coco has ended up appearing in anti-vice pamphlets.

And I ended up moonlighting in Japanese porn, but the less said about that the better.

Why do people stay in cults after they have joined?

Dick! I heard about the lay-off. What's a square-jaw crime fighter doing these days to bring in the bling?

After you lather me up with that strawberry hand lotion.

In order to answer this I came up with a little story that goes like this …

How do you relax?

Before there was MAGA there was … the Comics Code Authority

Torchy, we're unemployed … And no one is hiring scantily-clad wastrels these days.

Tess' boyfriend, Ed, now works as a Peter Lorre impersonator.

Marijuana makes Jesus cry!